This letter was written to Ian his senior year - as he was part of an alcohol prevention program. He was a 'victim' of a drunk driving simulation and as parents we were asked to write our kids letters like they actually died in the event. What would you say to them? The goal of the letter was to discourage alcohol use and abuse through the pain their untimely death would cause. I wrote the letter in Anderson's library with a bunch of other parents. I thought I would be creative and put "tear" marks on the paper. It was a good conversation peace - but Ian and I really had no disagreement about alcohol use, nor had we really any worries at all about drunk driving accidents. So, it was a clever exercise. I actually only took the pictures of the pages to share with Lanette who would write her letter the next day.
Ian kept himself clean. The least drinking Freshman probably on the whole Texas A&M campus. But he did go Home under circumstances so similar to this letter - minus the alcohol. He took his "wake up " meds regularly, but did not take his sleep synthesis meds. So in the absence of true rest, in the presence of a rigorous college schedule and late nights, a confluence of uncontrolled exhaustion resulted in him falling asleep while driving home in his car - leading to his accident.
The letter is remarkably true with how the response to Ian's going Home in so many ways. How I wish I did not write this letter and how I wish so much that this letter was not so accurate or prophetic. Funny, or not so funny - one letter to Ian is not enough to "process my grief." I am at almost 50 blogs and still processing.
Miss you everyday "e" - I am so proud of you. The love poured out by you and for you amazes me.
Love,
Dad
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