Ian,
You know that I hate running - always have. However your advice given to me and your example has motivated me to run. "Dad, if you want to get rid of that gut, you just need to run - at least 3 times a week." "Dad, it does not matter how far you run, but that you run consistently - you will get in shape quickly." "Stop running on your heels - it is bad for your knees. That is probably why you hate running so much and complain about knee pain. Run on the balls of your feet; run leaning forward; run engaging your core; run forward not falling back." "Dad, running this way will build your calves. You have chicken legs - this can change them!" Okay, this morning I was running in our old neighborhood in Vacaville - running like you said to run. I threw in push ups in three different positions as you taught me as well. This will help get me ready for a Tough Mudder or other active run - according to you. I can tell that following your advice has yielded fruit - I feel that the hill on Vacavalley is nothing. I came off the hill and passed up a lady and two dogs like they were walking. Well, they were just walking - but I was eating pavement. Since I can now think and run, rather than just be in pain, the run gave me time to reflect on my path throughout the old neighborhood - all the things I am thankful for, all the things I miss.
I first left the Mundell's house. So many memories on Shannon Drive. We virtually lived at their house. You learned to play basketball there with Kurt, Danny and Mr. Mundell. We walked up and down Shannon every year on Halloween - it was the best Trick or Treating in the neighborhood. We BBQed occasionally there and we walked to the half mile to the Mundells, or biked, or skated, or... Passed the park on Tributary Ridge. We only played there when you were very small and Danny had baseball nearby. You and Tyler and other friends may have gone there - but I remembered how little you were when we moved to CA - how big you grew! Mom and I ran the pathway along Wrentham for a while. It was the only time I actually ran before. We did circuit training. I think it was a change up for mom as well - she usually walked. I miss sharing exercising and activities with her. You and I road bikes with Indy on Wrentham. You bought your own Haro - you decked it out with curb bars to grind on curbs and other structures. You were so proud of that bike. In TX, I argued while you were in Jr. High and early High School to sell it and get one that fit you - but you always said it fit you. You finally got tired of trying to ride it up and down hills and it was parked finally. Aunt Mandi's kids have your bike now - no doubt they are proud to have one of your prized possessions. Patrick and his sisters will love riding it and doing tricks.
I passed Tyler's house - you Tyler, Ryan, and other friends would ride skateboards, bikes, run around, spend the night at each other's houses. What great friends you have! Your Gone to Texas party at our house on Trillick - they all showed up. You and Danny always had a herd at our house. But this was a big group. I BBQed - probably fajita's, but I know asparagus. You and your friends came in and out of the house from the pool and hot tub grabbing a handful and eating it. That was so California! You and your friends loved swimming - no matter the temperature. Swimming in cold water only meant that running in and out of the hot tub. You guys would play pool or video games in the Play Room (garage). What a great time!
Our old house - so many memories. The pool, the hot tub, the yard - for baseball, frisbee, football, sledding down the hill, Caylea climbing the trees, all sorts of stuff. Loved the layout - We were all so close together - never like being so far from you guys on Tributary Ridge. "I love you, you love me, we're a happy family, with a Danny, Caylea and Little Ian too - Mommy and Daddy love each of you!" Sleeping with mom on the couch after we watch a movie as a family. Seeing the Horns win a National Championship, seeing the Titians almost win the Super Bowl, 911, etc. "Jesus, Keeper of this life. You are my Refuge, my Savior, my Guide, watch over Danny, Caylea, Ian and Taylor tonight, guide their every footstep as they travel this life - and in some quiet moment call them to Your side, so they will come to know You, as the Keeper of this life." How God has been faithful to this nightly prayer - calling you, Caylea, Taylor and Danny to Himself and keep calling you. I pray He keeps calling us back and back as we stray. We played basketball, you took refuge with shooting baskets with Indy as Louie learned to open doors and freaked you out. Becky filled our Suburban with paper and taught us how to prank and be crazy. Saran wrapping and other "reverse-pranks" were launched from this house! We also joined her in the fun - remember singing carols out of tune to her family - shocked with our skill and then surprised them with pictures of her aunt. We skated, played hockey, through footballs, learned to ride bikes, played games in the rain in our Trillick cul de sac. Much more, so much more in that house and neighborhood. Not enough time; not enough memory retained. Need to look at pictures!
Brown's Valley Elementary School - I remember your first day in Kindergarden, You blossoming from the quiet young kid with Anna at Bethany Lutheran, to the kid that no teacher could keep quiet. Mr. Northrup's room arrangement to keep you Tyler, Ryan apart and they you socialized quiet kids, boys and girls alike. I remembered the block and a half walk to the school - you learning to make your lunch, the Halloween parades, coming to class events, us leaving you at 6th grade graduation, on and on. The park has a new play structure - that was the first place we played when we came to CA. You learned to be an active kid, trusting your strength and body there. We played football, learned to throw a frisbee and practiced pitching and hitting in that park.
I ran (walked quickly to be honest - I blame it on the deep cow prints not my lack of aerobic shape!) Old Rocky. This first was Danny and my place - you and Caylea were too young to climb for a while after coming to Vacaville. I remember your first time up Old Rocky - I carried you and helped Caylea to the top. That was my goal - not yours! Poppa Gene and Danny had to help us down. The cow prints cause tripping and falling. I remember coming up with a Mike Mundell, Indy and Shelby for the first time. Shelby saw a rabbit or something and was gone over the next two hills. Indy started out after her - I screamed his name, we all did - he returned and seemed to say with his eyes, "See what a good boy I am! Look at that crazy girl. You will have to go and get her. Let me help!" Indeed, Mike had to fetch his dog as we trailed. That was a good day. We came once or twice a year to the top if the light post or the top of the other hill. It was a family Fall classic event shared with friends often - Kelsi, Kurt, Aaron, others. Our last trip covered the full hill - from Vaca Valley to Woodcrest. Caylea, you and I walked it all. We paused to see our neighborhood from above, our home of your youth, your elementary school, Vacaville in panorama. We took some of my favorite pictures of my precious youngsters - who were to go to Jr. High and High School - how was that possible. Where had the time gone. It flew with Danny - would it fly with you as well? What would life be like in Texas? Old Rocky never changed in almost 11 years - but my babies and child were now nearly grown up. Father's feel this passage of time deeply with pride and a tinge of sadness.
I passed by Serek's street - what a interesting friend. That was your video game friend of your age. Chris Restel's house reminded me of how Danny's friends respected your Halo and other game skills. They often invited you to join their mutiplayer games (Halo, Madden, others) - yes a kid in elementary school competitive with high schoolers. Danny always involved you and Caylea. Indeed, Caylea and you were invited by Danny and Taylor to play lots of D&D as Laine painted an excited quest as Dungeon Master. That was fun - getting little statues, to be your characters, hearing the stories and listening to the laughter. It still echoes in my heart.
Ryan's house was down Woodcrest to the left. I think his house and Aaron Dicken's house were the last places you spent the night when you visited Vacaville in Jr. High by yourself. You told such stories of fun and reunion. The boys had changed for sure since you left - some for the better, some for the worst - but you were sure and steady following God's compass and calling.
The baseball fields on Brown's Valley were the place you and Danny played ball, Caylea learned to read, we spent hot days, cold nights, endured working in the snack shop, ate bad hot dogs and grew up as a family. Lots of joy, lots of thanksgiving. I did not run by them - not on the path, but clearly visible from on top Old Rocky. Memories clearly present, uncovered, dusted off by places and sounds all around me.
The path I ran reminded me of the walks, the rides with Indy and Charlie to a lesser extent. We loved those dogs - yes, Indy more! Indy was our first big family loss. What a hole he left moving on. But we watched him grow old, suffer and it was time. It is hard reconciling God's timing with mine. You had grown up for sure. You are a man - but too young, so much life seemed left here - but God wanted your life lived Home, not at our home. That is a hard surrender - to trust in His love and plan when you just don't agree! The rocks at my feet on old Rocky remind me of the rocks we had at our house to set up boundaries on our grass. A few of these boundary stones we carried down the mountain from one place to be at home and serve our purpose at our home. I guess that is somewhat what God chose - brought you to His Home for greater purposes. Lord, not my will but Your's be done.
We ran in Texas much more than in CA. We ran with track in Jr. High to get in shape. We ran playing basketball, after work, weekends, mornings - whenever. I hated Daylight savings time - it cut down our light and time to play!!! Nevertheless, we played for hours in the dark with bad spot lights on the goal. I went from being faster than you to slower, stronger to weaker, better shot to just a the proud father watching. We ran at Ultimate - you, Caylea and Danny all shared love for this sport. I may have introduced the disc to the family - but you guys transformed it to a joy loved in CA and TX. Thank you for inviting me to play with you at Zilker those times. Thank you for telling me the stories at Zilker as well. Not just frisbee, but you playing Bessie there with the band and lots of soccer, frisbee, dog walking people stopping to listen and crowd around to watch your skill. What joy near Rock Island had. How hard it was to lay you to rest there. It is a sacred place of memories and of you.
Our last runs were when you returned from A&M. We worked on cross training program to get ready for Tough Mudder or other runs like it. I complained and complained about running - around our neighborhood, at the Rec or wherever we found each other. I wanted to lift weights - that cardio not running. Why did I complain to spend one minute with you? Why wouldn't I run more when you would ask? I passed up so many opportunities - to do what? Watch TV? Play guitar? Put off till next time? Time was something we lacked and I did not treat it as precious. I am so sorry Ian.
I ran to meet you at the Rec that Saturday after the Maroon and White game. What a great time working out we enjoyed! I ran as you suggested - balls of my feet down, or at least tried to. I bought Vibrams, five finger things like you, recently and have tried to run as you taught me since you went Home. I was regular for a while - then I became too depressed to run for months. I am back running now. I feel you running with me. I know we share these times together. I know that I will run those Tough Mudder races in your honor, in your stead. I know we will run the streets of gold together at Home one day. I can't wait for that day, Ian.
I love you.
Dad
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